Serving Master

I was fast asleep. Master was working on something for something (I was too tired to even really follow his explanation of what he was researching) and I was just zonked. He gave me the order to go to bed. I showered first, as always, and then made my way to the dark bedroom in desperate need of sleep. I glanced at the clock on the dresser and winced when I realized it was way past 2am. I had no idea when or if Master would be joining me that evening but it was hot as hell in the room (even with the air and fans on) so I slept in nothing and used no blankets, just a thin sheet. (Normally I sleep in a thong and a t-shirt, just in case the kids need me at night, though lately I’ve been just sleeping in a thong. In winter I’m permitted to sleep in whatever keeps me warm – Master knows the winters here will be like nothing I’ve ever endured!)

I woke up to his whispering in my ear. I could barely make out what he was saying. The fog of deep sleep kept a tight grip on my mind but there was something happening around my legs. I tried to wake up and figure out what was going on, listen to what he was saying, respond appropriately… before I could even open my eyes I felt the ropes tighten and the words “handcuff knot” came through my sleepy head clear as a church bell on Sunday morning. Shivers of excitement burst through my body while my mind raced to wake up every inch of me it could.

SMACK!! My eyes flew open as his hand came down on my bare ass. “I asked you a question, slave! When are you permitted to cum?” he hissed. I knew I was still not thinking clearly but I also trusted my mind to answer for me without having to think it through, my training was going well so far. “When you command me to, Sir” I half whispered.

His fingers slipped into my pussy and danced along my vaginal walls, getting nice and wet before slipping back out to fondle my clit. “Very good, slave. Why would I permit you to cum?” he asked as he toyed with me, watching my body whither under his, watching as I realized my wrists and feet were bound. Lust, passion and excitement mingled across his face as he watched me realize that other than jerking around under him, any movement on my part would be next to impossible without his help.

My mind fumbled as I tried to grasp onto everything happening around me. My hands were bound above my head but pulled behind my back, my ankles were also bound and my legs bent at the knees behind me as well. I gasped as I realized my ankles and wrists were connected by the same rope that bound them.

THWAK!! Another smack came down, this time with the leather strap. Once across my ass, once across my back and once on my thighs before I could remember the question and call out the answer “because you desire me to cum, Master!” I cried out, part wishing that I had gotten the answer wrong, part hoping for more slaps and spanks, I do enjoy those so much after all!!

“VERY GOOD, Slave!!” he said as he laughed, almost as though even he had expected me to get it wrong. He yanked my hair back with one hand and slammed his fingers into my pussy yet again. He quickly began finger fucking me. I was so close to orgasm. I remember him ordering me, commanding me, training me constantly as he brought me closer and closer: “You want to cum, slave. That is not a question, that’s an order! You desire to cum for your Master! But you won’t! Not until I give you permission, will you? Hold yourself there, right there, on the edge!! Do NOT cum until I command you!!” His voice got deeper and his fingers faster as he continued. I remember crying out my “yes, Sir”  answers, desperate to obey, knowing that he would deny me any orgasms if I disobeyed.

I was fully awake now and ready to beg for permission to cum when he suddenly removed his fingers from inside my soaking wet pussy and almost immediently replaced them with his hard cock. He gave me permission to cum again and again and again. We changed positions a number of times and I lost count of how many orgasms he commanded me to have, I just know I thoroughly enjoyed every second I was getting.

When he was done fucking me he pulled out of me and then shoved his cock in my mouth, I drank his cum greedily and swallowed the gift he gave me. He fell onto me and we just laid there basking in the heat of our passion for a few minutes before he untied me and helped me to the shower.

The funny part here is that while in the shower I mentioned that I loved the session and the only complaint I would give was that it wasn’t long enough (he always asks what I would change at the end of sessions, he chooses if he will implement those changes but it’s nice to know he wants my opinion just the same!) He laughed at me and asked if I had any idea of when he first slipped the ropes around my ankles. Apparently from the time he restrained me to the time we got in the shower three full hours had passed!! It amazes me that I could honestly fuck and be fucked by Master all day long and know that I would enjoy every second of it!!!

This was how I woke up this morning!! What a lucky, lucky slave am I!

I stormed off to our room and attempted to slam the door. I’m not exactly sure why I was so upset, there were so many reasons floating in my head. I don’t even know what exactly I wanted from him I just hurt and couldn’t voice it yet so I ran. I ran to hide my pain, I ran to avoid his questions of “what’s wrong” and that look he gets in his eyes when he’s concerned for me. I just ran.

The door didn’t slam though. I turned around, angrier now that something else hadn’t gone my way and gasped when I realized Master had followed me into the room. He didn’t have a concerned look on his face. He was angry. He was tired of my pouty shit and he had finally gotten good and mad at me. I don’t know if this is what I was going for or if this was what my heart realized it wanted, but I wanted his wrath. I wanted his punishment. Maybe in some weird way I just wanted to know that I could really mess up and he would still want me. Whatever it was I knew I was in the wrong here. I knew that I had been topping from the bottom. The problem was, when I realized this, I didn’t know how exactly to stop!

I tried to take a few steps back from Master, he was so close I had to look way up just to make eye contact. I managed to get one step back before his hand was grasped around my throat, his eyes menacing and glaring at me.
“I have just about had it with this pouty shit you keep giving me” he practically growled. I couldn’t reply, his grip was too tight for me to think, let alone reply. I was able to breath but any more pressure and that would be taken from me as well. “When I ask you what’s wrong, I expect a real answer. I expect the truth. I do not want to hear you reply that nothing is wrong ever again. Don’t you dare try to get away with that again.”

With every emphasized word he shook me a little, as though to force it into my thick skull. A way to ensure he wouldn’t have to repeat himself. “Do you think, slave, that I do not know when something is bugging you? Do you think that I expect you to tell me ‘nothing’ even when I know better?”  I wasn’t sure he wanted an answer and my facial expression must have relayed my confusion for he shook me again but loosened his grip as he snapped out “Answer me, slave!”
I opened my eyes and looked at him for a brief moment as I answered “No, Master” and then felt my eyes slide shut again.

Somewhere inside of me I was secretly enjoying this, a smile managed to escape and cross my lips a bit. I opened my eyes quickly, knowing that my body language had once again betrayed me. Master was smiling back at me, in a way that only entertained evil can. I loved it. He knew it.

His grip tightened and his other hand grabbed my hair and yanked my head back even further. “I’m sure you’ve been doing this on purpose. I read your blog, I know what goes on in your head, but even better, I know how to read you.” His hand let go of my neck and slid down my torso to my belly and then down my jeans until a finger rested on my clit. I caught my breath. “I know exactly what you want, but that doesn’t always mean that I have time to provide it. I know exactly  how to read you” and with that he inserted his finger deep into my pussy, “but I might not always give you what it is you’re looking for”. His finger played with my g-spot, he listened to me gasp and felt me moving against him, desperate for more. He stopped just as I began to show signs of orgasm and pulled my hair even tighter. “I am your Master and you are my slave. You will bend to my will when I ask you to, I will not bend to yours. If you try to manipulate me again you will be flogged, you will be ignored and you will not sleep in my bed for at least a week. Do you understand this, slave?” his hand was around my throat again, the other hand still tangled in my hair “Yes, Master” I couldn’t help but smile as I replied. The idea of being flogged turns me on, but then I caught the second part of his threat, neglect. I hate it when he ignores me. It is quite possibly the single worst punishment he has ever given me. And that is not something I am willing to risk!! I NEED his attention, his dominance, his rules, his punishments at times. I hate his neglect, though I fully admit there are times I deserve that too.

All of this was going through my mind when I suddenly realized he had released me from his grasp, both neck and hair. I opened my eyes again to see what was going on. He was gone. Gone from our room, gone from my presence. I panicked for half a minute before running out of the room to find him, to see what I could do for him. I found him in the bathroom, getting ready for a shower. “Fetch me a towel, I am going to take a shower. You will be joining me, you don’t need a towel” he said.

He fucked me 4 times before the water ran cold. He denied my orgasm three of those times. I was sure he was going to deny me again when suddenly I heard the command to cum and I immediately obeyed. When he was finished with me he got out, toweled off and went to bed, but not before giving me one last order. “Drip dry. You may not come to bed until your hair is no longer wet, you may not use the towel or the hair dryer. This is how slaves who pout will be treated. Like dogs left in the rain.” and with that he was gone again. I cried for about half an hour. Silently of course. But tears just the same. But you better believe I’ll remember that punishment. And you better believe I’ll be working on the pouting thing (I know myself too well to say I’ve learned this lesson, I haven’t yet, I’m pretty damn stubborn, but then, that’s what training is for….)

By the time my hair was dry (about an hour?) Master was sleeping. I smiled in spite of my punishment. I’ve always been submissive, but I have a definite dominate streak that runs through my personality. I’ve always wanted someone to call me out when I try to pull that sort of shit. I’ve ALWAYS wanted to be corrected and overpowered and ordered to obey…. after YEARS of searching for someone who isn’t willing to put up with everything I give, I think I’ve finally found someone who has the patience, the time and the desire to bend me to his will.

Is it wrong that I find satisfaction in punishments?

–ariia

 
Bleh. There are days like today where I feel like I can do nothing right. Well that’s not entirely true. More like, I feel like I’m doing everything right and then I mess up somewhere and the whole day goes down hill.

It’s the whole learning curve thing, I’m sure. There’s so much to learn!! It’s so different from a normal relationship for me too, which is fine, I really enjoy being Master’s slave, but OMG there are days I just want to kick something. (Don’t worry, I won’t actually kick anything)

Take last night for example: Master randomly said he was going to a business meeting with a few colleges and that he’d be back around midnight and when he did return he was going to be working until very early the next morning. I was welcome to go to bed whenever I chose or I could wait up for him. And then he left. Which is all well and good, he can do as he pleases, but I had spent an hour and a half preparing dinner for us. I made a special romantic meal because I wanted him to know how grateful I was for everything he’s done for me lately. The business meeting was obviously going to be held at a restaurant somewhere and therefore Master would not be eating with me that night.

I know that the meeting was thrown together last minute, I know that Master has the right to do as he pleases no matter how it may affect me, that wasn’t really even an issue.  (Though I won’t lie, it did sting a bit and I had to fight feelings of being tossed to the side for a moment)

I waited up for Master. I made myself chicken noodle soup, put the dinner I had carefully prepared away for the next night and forced myself to be cheerful and find productive things to do while I waited for his return. When he got home he was happy to see that I had waited, then promptly sent me to bed. Ugh.

I hate to admit that I quite literally pouted until I fell asleep. I’m surprised I didn’t get whipped for it. I’m wondering if Master is being easy on me. If he is, I’m not sure I like it. I think I’d honestly prefer to have strict but clear guidelines than anything. Mostly because that’s how I parent. I always enjoyed the teachers who seemed like a real hardass at the beginning of the school year and then as you got to know them you really enjoyed (and learned!) in their classes. That’s the approach I take to parenting, I guess it’s the approach I expected with Master; but then that’s my problem isn’t it? I expected it.

I am Master’s slave. Not the other way around. He’s not mine to control and order around. I am his. He’s not under my wing and thumb, I am under his.
And that is where the trepidation and frustration lies. I keep expecting things to go this way and then getting frustrated when they go another direction.

I’ll get this down, I know I will, but the learning curve in the mean time might drive me up a wall. I can say on the positive side I am learning to trust and obey Master first. He sent me on a walk to the store earlier and the only store I knew of in this area was about 8 miles away from our apartment.  Master had asked me to walk to the store to get milk, I contemplated driving anyway for about two hours (I figure I’ll be fully honest here, I have nothing to lose with honesty lol). I almost did drive, but I feared Master’s disapproval and punishment more than I feared the walk itself. Sure enough Master knows best. There was a store that I hadn’t noticed before (and probably wouldn’t have noticed if not asked to walk there) that was maybe .5 miles from the house. And I had obeyed him fully. So I know I am learning, it’s just the process as a whole that overwhelms me from time to time. Oh if only it were easy, but then, easy ways out tend to be forgettable and not worth it in the long run.

Any advice from slaves who have been in this for a while and have tips for adjusting would help!! (I hope)

In the meantime, Master just gave me a new assignment so I need to get going

Thanks for reading!
-ariia